Mwwh, mwwh

Hey, I made to back to the UK in one piece and I'm now safely ensconced in the loving bosom of my parents. I've spent the last couple of days agonising over what to buy people for christmas, buying christmas presents, worrying that I haven't bought the right thing/what is wanted/an appropriate present/etc. etc. but now I've reached the stage of 'what the heck, I've done my best on the scanty information available and if you don't like it then give me better information next time!'.

We spent this afternoon putting up the decorations (all of us putting off the actual wrapping of presents - such a tedious process for such little reward) and now I'm longing for bed as I'm one tired Shiralee.

Merry Christmas everyone and I hope you have a Very Happy New Year.

All my love and mwwh, mwwh kisses.

Bits and Pieces

Hey people, it's time for my weekly update of things that have happened since I last posted...

Breaking news, I've bought a printer. How did I ever cope before without one? Ok, there's been a few problems with me only having four USB ports and having to buy powered hubs which work but owning an external hard drive which insists on being directly connected to my laptop in two of those ports (what ever happened to keeping it simple and make it work with anything?) but I've sorted it out now.

It has snowed again but that hasn't been a problem.

I'm getting used to the 6am starts (so much so that I still wake up that early even when I'm not working).

I get the keys to the new house on Friday and can start moving my things in. There's still some damp-proofing work to be done but that should be finished before I return in January (and, hopefully, the mess cleared up).

I think that's about it.

This time next week I'll be in the UK (all things being equal) so if I don't post before, HAVE A MERRY CHRISTMAS AND A HAPPY NEW YEAR.

White Christmas redux

It's snowing again here but, surprise, surprise, that hasn't had any major effect on the train (yet, fingers crossed). It was still late this morning but that's not unusual. What did amaze me was just how high the heating was on the train. I had to take my coat and my fleece off or expire in a puddle of sweat. Around me were all these Italian women dressed to the nines in their fur coats, acting as if we were actually in a freezer. I wonder how much was psychological (it's snowing outside so it must be cold) and how much was showing off (look at my lovely coat) but none of them seemed to be glowing let alone breaking into a sweat.

Another development of these early starts is that I've developed a latte makiato (forgive my spelling Mr Jam) habit. This is a large, hot milk with a shot of coffee. I'm not much of a coffee drinker but this sets me up nicely for the rest of the day and, such is my timetable, I usually have time for one before I start teaching. I'll never be Italian but I'm starting to make baby steps into embracing the culture.

Random stuff...

In other news from freezing Italy...

I've been rewatching Buffy The Vampire Slayer. The woman whose flat I'm staying in has all series one to six. I'm halfway through series three and plan to finish them all before Christmas. That will only leave series seven - how the world was really saved - which I'll probably borrow from a video club, just so I can say I've completed them all.

I do not understand the Italian obsession with blankets. How can they not understand the undeniable advantages of duvets? They have quilts (like thick bedspreads) but duvets?!?

How come there is no public transport to the big supermarkets here? It isn't even as if the stores are really out of town, merely on the edges but relatively inaccessible if you don't have a car. Why is this? Are non-car owners not welcome? Guess I'll have to depend on the goodwill of some friends.

Right, that's about all that's been wittering through my mind.

Working nine to five...

My first full week of work is topped off by a long weekend due to a national holiday. So, instead of working on Saturday, I'm in an internet cafe, skyping with a friend about the work I'm supposed to be doing next week and sending emails to the company letting them know what I expect of them. It's work, Jim, but not that I'm getting paid for!

Having said that, this past week has been fun. There have been frustrations but the students are an interesting bunch of people and I've learned a fair amount from them (this is how it should be, everyone has something to share but a good teacher gets them to do it while learning something) I think this contract is only to Christmas and a lot of what I've been doing has been damage control after the previous teacher, however, I am quietly confident that the company will want to continue employing me in the new year.

Aside from work? well, it has been perishing here, snow, fog, freezing fog, wind and rain, but, as one of my students said "It is winter time."

I'm looking forward to being back in the UK for Christmas and I've started buying presents already. In the new year, I move into my new home which will free up a lot of my time. It will mean the Vigevano students will be coming to me rather then the other way round, so it should sort out those (parents) who are having classes for their kids in their homes because a) it's convenient and b) there's some sort of status involved.

Me, a status symbol. Who'd have thought it.

Homeward bound....

Since Tuesday I've been working in Milan during the day and in Vigevano at night. On the surface this should be an ideal arrangement but, as with all things, there is a fly in the ointment.

In this case the fly is big, made of metal and often disinclined to do it's job. I'm talking about the train service to Milan. There are only about three trains during the peak hours and outside that they run once an hour. In the morning, when being on time is really important, they seem to be regularly cancelled or late, and in the afternoon, when it really doesn't matter as much they usually leave smack on time. Also, even once the train has left the station, there is no guarantee that it will arrive at the other end on time (in fact, you can almost guarantee it will arrive late).

The people of Vigevano have been complaining about the poor service for many, many years and for an almost equal number of years, the train company has promised to put in a second line. I've been told they are actually building this line now but no-one has any hopes of it being operational soon.

One interesting incident which I think illustrates just how annoyed the passengers have become is that about three weeks ago, the passengers went on strike! A train had left Vigevano approximately on time but had stopped at Abiategrasso for some reason. The passengers on that day had had enough. They got off the train, and congregated on the line, stopping the trains in both directios from going any where. I don't know if the passengers achieved anything but it certain relieved some of the tensions.

Dream, dream, dream...

I keep having the most weird dreams about teeth. I know I've spent a fair amount of time and money on trying to sort mine out but these dreams are just weird.

In the latest one, my silver crown (I don't actually have a silver crown) had fallen out and I asked my mum to put it back in, she tried to put it in the wrong way round so I had to show her how - it was like a bulldog clip - and when I looked at the crown close up it was like a cross-section of brain (all wrinkled) framed in metal. To make matters worse, the tooth part was filled with chewed food, even though I protested that I'd spent five minutes cleaning my teeth since last eating.

In addition, one of my front teeth has turned around (it was like a metal plate) so that the grey side was showing and I had to twist it back into position.

See what I mean - a really creepy dream.

I'm sure dream interpretation has specific meanings for teeth but I don't know what it is and I'm obsessing about the damned dream!

I'm dreaming of a...

OK, tomorrow the big push starts. It's 6:30am starts and (up to) 10pm finishes. I can see I'll be doing nothing but working, sleeping and eating for the next three weeks!

I'm looking forward to christmas already.

Life is good

I'm official. Today Cz and I went to the town hall and I got my Codice Fiscale (my tax code) which means I can now start invoicing for the work I've been doing, pay my taxes (30% - ouch!), open a bank account and generally become part of this lifestyle. The one thing I don't actually need is a Permisso di Sogiorni - as a European citizen I'm exempt.

I'm still waiting for the company in Milan to give the yes or no about work next week but with the way the weather's been, I won't be horribly disappointed if the answer is no.

I'm really looking forward to the end of the term (three and a half weeks) and getting back to the UK for Christmas. The next thing after that will be settling into my new home and moving my classes to there - no more being driven to other people's homes and teaching in their living rooms. Interesting as that has been, it is also extremely distracting for the kids (who find it hard enough to concentrate as it is).

Life is good.

I'm dreaming of a white....

Hey people, it's been snowing here. Yes, I know it's been snowing all over Europe but this is where I am so that's what's important to me.

Apart from that, nothing of importance has happened.

Do you want to dance?

All change on the accommodation front.

I had to leave the place I was temporarily staying in as the owner had to come back for a family emergency, so since last Thursday I've been staying with an Italian family who are friends of Cz. I've never stayed with a 'host family' before and the prospect terrified me. I hate the thought of offending anyone through inappropriate behaviour (see, mum, you did have a good effect on me) or making a fool of myself (even though I seem to do that regularly). However this family have taken me to their hearts. I'm learning how to cook Italian style (but I'm still waiting for you to return to Italy for proper lessons, Mr Jam), how to eat Italian style and I'm even picking up bits of the language.

I'll only be here for a week then I can move back to where I was before. I'll be glad to get my 'own' space back but I will miss the communal meals. Having said that, the effort I've put into losing weight (about 2lbs a week since I've been here) was completely voided by two days of meals. The mother M piles up my plate and I don't know how to say no - I'm not being greedy (and I do know the Italian for no) but I don't want to be rude.

In further accommodation news, today Cz and I went to meet a couple who are willing to let their house to me. It has a ground floor sitting room which I can use for teaching, a large kitchin/dining room, one bedroom plus a walk-through sleeping area and a bathroom. I may have to buy some odds and ends but the house is near the station, I like the people and they like me and the price is right. I will be able to leave my stuff there before flying back to the UK for Christmas and be able to move in when I return in the new year.

I am doing a happy dance as I type.

Rubbing down the rough spots...

Yes, I'm still here but I don't have the internet where I'm staying so everything is very sporadic. Work has started and I'm picking up more classes as time goes on.

Went to look at a flat yesterday. It was very nice, good location, two rooms and a separate kitchen and bathroom, even the price was good. The problem? It hadn't been cleaned or decorated since the beginning of the last millennium and the owner wasn't prepared to redecorate if I was only going to be there for 7 months!

All it would have taken was one weekend with plenty of detergent, plus a couple of days painting the walls white (again). I'm considering offering to do that myself.

I'll keep you posted.

Up, up and away...

It is possible that my last post worried a few people - AS WELL IT SHOULD - your whole life should be about ME and my welfare. OK, maybe that's a little strong. I do appreciate it when people read my blog. I try to be honest here which includes at least some indication about how I'm feeling about whatever I'm doing, however the written word does miss out on some of the important contextual information. I may write something as a joke but without the tone of voice, it can come across as a serious statement, even a plea for help. Trust me, if I want anyone's help, I will ask. So my darlings (and you know who you are), don't go getting your knickers in a twist.

I'm alive, I'm healthy and the drugs are still working (see, that was a joke). I've relocated to Vigevano where I'm semi-subletting from a friend of a friend whilst working and looking for something more permanent.

I survived the kids classes but just how long they and I will last is a different matter. I've got four hours of teaching here in Vigevano on Saturday (adults, thank god) and I'm meeting up with some people in Milan on Sunday so things are coming together albeit slowly.

Must go now and eat (the welcome dish prepared by the mother of the woman who's employing me).

Ciao my lovelies.

It's cold outside...

I have to say that this teaching kids lark is not fun. You think it's all going to be colouring-in, playing games and singing songs. Well, it is BUT, how do you explain something in English to a group of six year olds who are still coming to terms with their own language, have only just started normal school and are still learning to read and write?

And the singing. I love singing, but I'm wise enough not to inflict my voice (which is actually pretty good when I don't have an audience) on those around me. However, I have no choice with the kids class, singing is part of the deal and the songs (which are on CD) are pitched at such a high note I swear only dogs can hear them clearly. Today I could end up being accused of child abuse simply because I tried to sing with them - oh, and do the actions.

Nevertheless, things are moving along and on Saturday I have adult classes which will be a great relief. I'm also moving to Vigevano over the next few days, initially into a friend of a friend's flat but eventually somewhere of my own.

Things have been tough at times, not having anyone to talk to (everyone I know is busy working) and no access to the internet where I'm staying (and we did try) but as I said, things are moving.

In the meantime, fry me a kipper, I'll be back for breakfast!

On the run...

One very quick post just to let you all know I'm alive and well. I start teaching kids today, God alone knows if I'll continue. Will write a fuller post when I have more time (and peace and quiet).

Always look on the bright side of life...

Sorry about the gap. I am actually in Milan, staying with a friend and enduring the worst kind of weather. It's raining, almost constantly and pretty windy, but it isn't that cold. So I dress up for the rain and wind and then sweat because it's balmy - go figure.

I've spent the last couple of days meeting people, being 'interviewed' for jobs and trying to sort out whatever it is I need to do next. There is a lot of hurry up and wait which is, I guess, par for the course, but it has made me pretty anxious.

Anyway, tomorrow I'm placement testing in Vigevano and, hopefully, looking at flats at the same time. I need an address so that I can get my Permisso di Sourjoune (I think that's how it's spelt) and so that I can open a bank account. In addition I need a Codicile Fiscale (again with the spelling) which is a tax code, and I need to open a Partita IVR which means I can operate as a professional.

Luckily I have people helping me do all this BUT they are doing it in their free time, of which they do not have much.

My first priority, however, is finding somewhere to live. My friend has been very generous but I need a place of my own. Wish me luck.

Wish me luck as you wave me goodbye...

Today I fly to Italy. My bag is packed, passport and euros in my handbag, e-ticket in my hand.

It's the first time I've flown anywhere without a contract. I have two job promises (both of which I trust otherwise I wouldn't be doing this) but I've still got to sort stuff out there.

It's the first time I've flown abroad without having somewhere to live. I'll be staying with a friend in the short-term but I will need to find somewhere very quickly (I need my independence).

It is a little (lot) nerve-wracking but it is about time I took this step, otherwise I'll be at the whim of schools for the rest of my working life.

Please, please, please, keep your fingers crossed for me.

Love is all around...

Oh my did I get drunk on Saturday. Not horribly drunk, not falling down drunk and definitely not nasty drunk but not quite able to walk in a straight line drunk. The reason? My cousin got married. We do love a wedding in my family and this was a wonderful wedding.

The bride - blushing and beautiful
The dress - the full meringue
The bridesmaids - fluttering flowers
The groom - nervous and proud
The best man - funny but restrained
The parents - dignified and happy

The church wedding was very Four Weddings, the reception was very Beerling (if you don't understand that, don't worry), rapprochements were made, gossip was exchanged, dances were boogied and much, much laughter was heard.

In all, a damned good bash.

Would you adam and eve it?

The visit to Canterbury was fascinating. We discovered several family members and have managed to fill out the tree a bit. Next stop, the non-conformist records (why aren't you surprised?).

Thank god for the internet. Once I'm set up in Italy I'll be able to continue the computer stuff for my mum. It is getting interesting, people!

Stuff and nonsense

I have no idea what I've been doing for the last couple of days. Nothing special has happened, I haven't been anywhere and I haven't done anything. How does that happen?

Still, tomorrow I'm off to Canterbury with my mum to look at parish records. We are tracing my family history (and when I say we, I really mean my mum with me just giving occasion aid on the computer). I do enjoy this sort of research but it can be a full time occupation and I do have other things on my mind at the moment.

Like - what do I pack? just how many pairs of shoes can I stuff into a suitcase? should I pack any books? make-up, yes or no? (I think yes), is my iPod up-to-date? where's my passport?

See, important stuff

You can get it if you really want it...

Next Tuesday I'm flying to Milan.

Hopefully I'm starting work the following Monday.

In between I have to find somewhere to live.

Wish me luck.

Going to the dentist's and I'm gonna get...

I went back to the dentist today as today is the day I had my retainers fitted.

I was expecting plastic plates - one to line my hard palate and the other to fit under my tongue - with wires to hook onto my teeth in some way. I was expecting this mainly because during my first attempt to straighten my teeth (some thirty-odd years ago) that's what I had.

My, how things have changed. The start of the process (last week) was the same as thirty-odd years ago. Soft, squashy, suffocating plastic was smeared over a form and the form was pushed over my teeth where it was held in place by the dentist until the soft plastic had set, thus creating a mould (and leaving an weird but not totally unpleasant taste in my mouth along with several pieces of leftover plastic). However, from there onwards everything was different.

From the mould was made the retainers. Hard but not scratchy. Clear rather than opaque. Encasing rather than hooking. Yes my new retainers are incredible. They actually fit completely over my teeth. You know when you go to a furniture store and all the sofas are wrapped in plastic - that's my teeth.

The retainers are very discreet - nobody notices them unless I point them out (although I haven't kissed anyone while wearing them - then they would be noticed I think), I can wear them for everything except swimming and hot drinks, and they click out for cleaning when I do my teeth. Eating with them is a little unusual as I feel I can't chew my food properly but I had salad tonight and it wasn't a problem.

On top of all that, they may well help with my teeth grinding habit.

I'm on my way...

I think my luck has changed.

After weeks of anxiety (and a mild case of the blues) I seem to have found a job. I have to say that it's not due to my hard work and persistence but more to do with asking for help.

You may or may not know that I'm not very good at asking for help - mostly I'm afraid that people will say no (and that has happened on more than one occasion). However, I have come to realise that my friends don't say no and that even when I've been a selfish, lazy cow ("No" I hear you say, "not you Shiralee" but yes I'm afraid so and much too often) my friends have always helped me out. My problem is that I put off asking for help for far too long and end up in situations where what I'm asking for can be too much for one person.

Right now I'm just gleeful at finally finding paid employment. I think my parents will be too. My mum has been worried that I'm sinking into depression (I will not be depressed - life is too short) and when my mum worries, my dad worries - and we have enough dramas in the family without me adding to them.

More when it's all confirmed.

Should I stay or should I go now...

I'm am feeling a little down at the moment. I haven't been shortlisted for the local job I wanted - I matched all the requirements on paper but it's likely they already knew who they wanted to employ - and I'm no further forward with work in Italy.

On top of all this, my relations are all getting married and having babies. Now, whilst I'm over the moon happy for them, it does throw my own lack of a life into high relief. I know I am truly blessed with parents who not only don't have a problem with me staying here indefinitely but have made it clear that there is no pressure on me to do anything, however, I am in limbo.

Do I up sticks and head for Italy, where I don't have anywhere to live (I would be relying on the kindness of friends initially) but where I should be able to get work, or do I hang on here where I have a very comfortable home, no social life and no immediate work, in the hope that the seeds sown in Italy over the last couple of months bear fruit. On top of this I'm still looking for jobs in the UK but I wonder if I'm just wasting my time.

I hate making decisions, it's something I'm very bad at.

Smiley Happy People Pt II

They're off! and, boy, does it feel weird. They, of course, being my brackets. I did thing my teeth and tongue would feel too small for my mouth after a couple of years of overlying metal but that isn't the case.

The orthodontist I saw said that the work wasn't finished in that two of my molars are still slightly rotated (I don't know whether it's because the wire had slipped out or the Argentine dentist lied to me about them being ready, but it certainly explains her reluctance to write a referral letter), however at my request and with a signed waiver he took them off.

It was not a pleasant process. I assumed, somewhat naively it seems, that as the brackets were stuck to my teeth with cement, some sort of solvent would be used to unstick them. No. Not as such. The reality is the orthodontist used a pair of pincers (proper dental pincers) and a drill to crack each bracket off each tooth. It isn't painful per se, but it is bloody uncomfortable and can feel like your tooth is being wrenched out of it's socket.

Finally, the orthodontist got rid of the composite with a dental sander (I don't know it's real name), trimmed the edges of my broken front teeth (which is what precipitated the whole teeth-straightening shenanigans) and filled my mouth with putty to take impressions for the retainers.

Again, it shows how naive I am, I thought the whole thing would take about half an hour. It actually took an hour and a half (including a panoramic x-ray) but I now have a beautiful smile. Next week I get the temporary retainers fitted. After that I can arrange a scale and polish and make a decision about the gap in my lower jaw.

Smiley, happy people Pt I

Today is the big day. Today is the day when (fingers crossed) I have the brackets removed from my teeth.

More later...

Home or away?

Teeth update:

After much too-ing and fro-ing I've finally got an appointment with a local dentist to have the brackets removed and removable retainers fitted, and this for about two-thirds of the cost quoted by the foreign dental company. I may still be going with them for the crowns but it'll take a lot of persuading for me to have an implant fitted.

To be honest, I've been less than impressed by the foreign dental company. As I said before, the proposal I was given made only a passing mention of bracket removal with only a verbal quote and no time scale, and when I tried to make an appointment for this in London (I was told their orthodontist only worked in London) they decided I needed to go to Budapest to commence the implant treatment (this is where the big money is). Obviously the plan was to get me there and then 'bully' me into having stuff done that I wasn't ready for (nor can afford at the moment). When they did finally get back to me about an appointment in London, the earliest they could offer was the middle of November! I'm just glad I did some phoning around.

Never smile at a crocodile...

I seem to be going from one extreme to the other. Woke up this morning with a stuffed head - my cold has come back after yesterday's rainy walk (and will my parents accept responsibility for it? will they heck as like!). So I went back to sleep for a couple of hours. Now this is good in theory, I like to sleep when I'm ill, but bad in practice as it means I'm going to find it difficult to sleep tonight.

Still chasing dentists. And, by god, don't they fancy themselves! It is often reported here that it's difficult to find a good dentist and when you do, dental treatment is expensive. Well, they aren't joking. I've been quoted £55 and £95 just to have an orthodontist look at my teeth, £120 per hour for any work done plus £75 to £100 per retainer (I need two) and then only with a referral letter from my Argentine dentist! And everyone wonders why the British have such bad teeth.

I'll may be going abroad to get them done, I certainly can't afford to get any of the other work done in this country. In fact, dentists have come from Hungary to set up a mobile practice in the UK, charging about a third of the local prices (and even then, dental treatment is out of the reach of many people).

Shakespeare said (Second Part of King Henry VI, Act Iv, Scene II) "The first thing we do, let's kill all the lawyers." I think they would be swiftly followed by the bankers and dentists.

Bits and pieces...

Today has been a day of mixed fortunes. It started with an early morning wake-up so I could join my parents on one of their walks. The walk was good but, unlike the previous times, the weather was not. I know the British always go on about the weather but that's because we have so much of it. So today I was windswept and rained upon - one bright spot, I had a bacon sandwich.

Then later I applied for two more jobs. Again, I've probably got less chance than a cat in hell of even being shortlisted but I've got to keep on trying. In all honesty, I still hoping the job in Northern Italy will come together and, as these other jobs don't start until December, there's still a good chance it will.

Still haven't managed to get anything done about my teeth. I went for an initial consultation in London but that dentist completely overlooked the removal of my brackets and the provision of retainers, and every attempt I've made to get a price for this (and nothing else can happen until this is dealt with) has been met with silence. It looks like I'm going to have to dig deep into my pocket and get this done in the UK.

And now my eyes are giving me gyp. Sometimes I just can't focus them no matter where I hold the book or how far I am from the television. I don't know whether to see another optician (I had them tested and new glasses in July) or the doctor.

Finishing on a good note, I cooked tea (or supper, whichever you want to call it) for my parents and they thoroughly enjoyed it.

Fly little birdies, fly away...

As I'm sure everyone in the UK (and possibly Europe) knows, we've been having some wonderful weather recently. I could say it's because it was my birthday recently (when the good weather started) but that would be a little presumptuous of me and I'm never presumptuous. But whatever the reason, we here in the Matthews household are trying to make the most of it, mainly by spending as much time as possible out of doors.

With this in mind, and following on from my seafront walk with my mum on Sunday, yesterday I went on a birdwatching walk with my dad. Now you know my eyesight isn't that good (bloody awful, in fact) which makes looking at small objects far away a difficult and sometimes pointless activity. The is exacerbated by the fact that I can't use binoculars (my eyes don't work together) and I'll be damned if I'm carrying around a telescope (again I've never come to terms with those things). However, this inability does mean I've become very good at interpreting shapes and noticing movement.

So, I may not be able to see the colours of all the little birdies but I can distinguish between a cormorant, a seagull, a duck and a crow when they are overhead. I can even tell the difference between a cormorant and a heron when they are in flight.

STOP laughing! That's an achievement for me.

It's raining men...not

I've been looking at profiles. You know, on the dating sites I've joined and, bloody hell, there are some buses out there.

Definite no-no's:
a comb-over (cut it short, shave your head, have some dignity)
a beer belly ('yes' to honesty but 'no' to ill-fitting clothes)
black and white photos (just how old is that picture?)
extreme close-ups (why won't you show me your ears?)
fuzzy full-length shots (your face can't be any worse than mine, can it?)
coy over-the-shoulder or upward looking glances (what are you hiding?)
smiling with your mouth closed (it doesn't look natural, see a dentist if your teeth are that bad)
pulling a funny face (it doesn't say you have a GSOH, it says you're a berk)
phantom limbs from people cropped out of the photo (are you so sad that you can't take your own photo? or so alone you don't have a friend to do it for you?)
your passport photo (no-one looks good in a passport photo and it makes you look cheap)

And here are some of my personal preferences
short hair (few are the men who have long flowing locks past the age of 21; a stringy ponytail just looks rank)
neatly groomed face fungus (I didn't use to like beard and mustaches until I met a certain Mr Jam - keep them trimmed and clean)
short, clean fingernails (talons are for women only, I don't care how sexist that seems)
ditto toenails (short and filed, I hate being scratched by toenails)
extremely high standards of personal hygiene (you'll only be sweaty after I've finished with you)
good teeth (spend that beer money on seeing a dentist)

Notice I don't say anything about height, weight, eye and hair colour, age or personal circumstances (but don't bother me if you're married - been there, have no desire to revisit). Obviously I have preferences in these areas but, as with Mr Jam, these preferences can change for the right person.

So if you happen to be reading this and know of someone who fits the bill, let me know.

(Next week, I'll be parading up and down the high street with a placard!).

Cupid, draw back your bow...

I have a dirty little secret. One which I haven't shared with anyone else (except J) but one which I'm going to talk about here - because, let's be honest, no-one apart from Mr Jam reads this blog any more.

As you know (if you've read my blog), I recently turned 47 years old. That's a real grown up type of age, and I've been thinking that maybe I'd like to do a grown up type of thing - like find a partner and settle down. Now I know that those of you who know me will find that difficult to believe. It's not that I'm the original free-spirit (I'm not the original anything) and it's not that I hate men (although I am a little picky) but I don't have much of a track record when it comes to grown up relationships. One relationship in my late twenties (he did ask me to marry him but he drove me up the wall), a doomed flirtation with my boss (who was using me to cover up his affair with another colleague), a long period of hermit-hood followed by working abroad and falling in love with a married man... Let me put it this way, if it was a CV, I wouldn't employ me. And this combined with my spectacular ability to not fit into any stereotype (too tall, too fat, too ugly, too assertive etc.) has left me in a position where I don't think I'll ever meet anyone.

So, this is my dirty secret... I've joined not one, not two, not three but four on-line dating agencies. And when I say joined, I mean I haven't paid any money (because who knows how long I'll be in the UK - see what I mean?) but I have posted a profile and some pictures.

The response? well, to say it has been underwhelming is to overstate the case. Over the total of four agencies my profile has been viewed 7 times, no-one has tried to make contact in anyway at all and, whilst two men have marked me as a favourite (like a flavour of ice-cream?) one is 19 and the other is dog-mad. I did 'wink' at one man who promptly deleted me - fair enough but more than the standard message would have been appreciated.

And while we're on the subject of dogs, one of the sites asks for your pet hates. One man (not the one mentioned above) replied that his labrador hates loud noises and getting wet. Sad thing is, I don't think it was meant as a joke. Anyway, I'll leave the profiles up there until I know what I'm going to be doing then either suspend them (moving abroad) or pay money (staying in the UK).

But really, people, is it my age, my cynicism, my lack of coyness or the fact that I'm old, fat and ugly?

The beautiful briney sea...

Well, we didn't quite make seven miles (4.1 according to our pedometres) but it was great fun. Despite it being October and therefore officially winter (we don't do autumn any more), the sun was blazing, the breeze was soft and the sea was calm. I took some photos but my battery ran out so I can't upload them at the moment. We stopped for a cup of tea (or three) at a lovely cafe and did some putting of the world to rights.

My parents have their favourite walks in various parts of Thanet so tomorrow I'm out with my dad on one of his top ten walks. At this rate I might start sleeping again at night.

Welcome back Mr Jam, glad to know the pair of you are safe and sound. We'll talk soon.

And I don't have the flu - RESULT!

I'm walking, yes indeed...

I have a cold. I don't know if I've already told you this but I have a cold.

Normally, when I'm ill, I just get on with it but as I'm living with my parents, I've regressed to a pathetic level of self-pity - and this despite the fact that both my parents are suffering much more than I am.

My remedies are frozen grapes (good for the sore throat), hot tea (good for the digestion) and chocolate (just good).

Tomorrow my mum is taking me out for a walk because she thinks I need the fresh air - I'm not happy, fresh air was what got me into this mess in the first place! However, there is no denying my mum when she's made her mind up so tomorrow we go on a seven mile hike along the sea front.

I expect to get the flu.

Stuck in the middle...

I'm in a bit of a dilemma. I have conflicting priorities.

I have to get my teeth finished.
I have to find a job (I'm living off my savings and my parents good graces at the moment).
I want the job I've applied for in this country.
I want to keep the option of moving to Italy open.

It doesn't sound like much, does it? but none of it fits together and it's all out of my hands.

The teeth thing. I had an initial consultation in London with a dentist who completely ignored that fact that I have brackets (permanent braces) on both sets of teeth which need to be removed. She gave me a proposal that included all the other work with half done in Budapest and half in London but nothing about how the removal of the brackets and the fitting of a retainer fits into the schedule. I phoned to get some advice and was basically given the same again. And we're talking about £2,500 here.

I want to put down some roots. The reason I discounted the UK was because the job prospects were non-existent. Now I've applied for a job locally but the interviews aren't for a couple of weeks (always assuming I am shortlisted) and if by some miracle I get the job, it doesn't start until 1st December. In the meantime, I have an interview with someone in Italy, for a more nebulous post. It's a friend of a friend, who could provide accommodation and some work, leaving me free to find private work. But nothing is guaranteed.

This post doesn't go anywhere, no decisions can be made and I just needed to get this off my chest.

Thanks for your patience.

It's my birthday and I'll sing if I want to...

So, today is my birthday. I am forty-seven (yes 47) years old. How did that happen? Where did the time go? I feel like I'm about 30/31 - old enough to know better but young enough not to care.

People, I am nearly fifty years old? FIFTY! There's definitely something wrong here.

I don't feel forty-seven, I certainly don't look forty-seven and I am sure as hell never going to act as if I'm forty-seven.

For those of you who remembered - many thanks.

For those of you who didn't - shame, shame, shame! Today IS the most important day in the calendar.

BTW I am FORTY-SEVEN years old today. Huh?!?

Thank You For The Music

Some reflections.

When I was on the train to London last Friday I was trying to listen to a podcast (on my iPod of course) entitled "The Quiet Carriage" about train carriages where you shouldn't use mobiles, personal music systems etc. And I couldn't hear half of it because of the continual announcements over the train's PA system. Wonder if there was a quiet carriage on that train?

Still don't have a job, and I'm still applying left, right and centre. Don't know what I've done wrong. Onwards and upwards.

Went to see Mamma Mia again tonight. This was the special sing-along version. The cinema was packed (I think there was one free seat) and of the approximately 150 people in there, six were men (I counted). We ended up standing, singing along and waving our arms in the air. Luckily the sound was turned up very high, drowning out all our off-key attempts to join in. I cried twice this time (I am turning into an emotional wreck) and thoroughly enjoyed myself.

Just in case you didn't know, it's my birthday this week. No presents expected but birthday wishes gratefully received.

Ciao people.

Roll Over Beethoven

Well my dears, I'm back from London with a new filofax (purple leather - get me!), a 'program' for sorting my teeth out (ouchy with the numbers) and a bagful of classical CDs.

I stayed over with bf J, her daughter and partner, and he (her partner) has a business selling classical music CDs to discerning customers. In doing so he buys stock from other collectors and various classical music nuts (my description, not his). Unfortunately this sometimes means he ends up with stuff he can't sell to the discerning customer, which made today my lucky day.

I know next to nothing about classical music, I have various pieces on my laptop but, and it's a big but, I can't tell the good stuff from the bad stuff (both in terms of composition and quality of performance) so he gave me a bagful of CDs his customers wouldn't buy, just to get me started. A sort of 'Janet and John' of classical music.

I am well pleased.

When I Was Just A Little Girl...

Whilst reading one of the blogs I follow (The Amazing Adventures of Dietgirl), I came across this idea: What is something you'd love to say to your younger selves of 2, 5, 10 and 15 years ago?

2 years ago (2006): Make the most of your time in Argentina and don't give up on the Tango. Ok, the men won't want to dance with you because you're taller and wider than they are but persevere!

5 years ago (2003): So you've just finished in Egypt. Don't dwell on the negatives, remember the positives. Later you'll think back and thank AF for being such a bitch!

10 years ago (1998): you've got about six months left in your current job, learn everything you can about the redundancy policy, clear the decks and make a plan for the coming eighteen months - DON'T waste that time.

15 years ago (1993): What the hell are you doing with your life? You're holding down a full-time job and a full-time voluntary post and getting no thanks for either. Get away from the television at the weekend and get a life!

If I seem unduly harsh on myself, it's because I can now see some of the mistakes I've made in my life. BUT I have no regrets. Regrets are for losers. The wise person learns from her mistakes and doesn't repeat them (which must make me a moron).

Clowns to the left, jokers to the right....

Looks like I spoke too soon. I got an email today from the school that made the conditional offer. They've withdrawn it as they don't have the business contracts they need - see, the credit crunch is affecting everything. So I've taken a deep breath, swallowed my dignity and re-applied to those companies who ignored my first contact. I've tried to be more direct (ie contact the school directly) this time and be more explicit in my cover letter.

Cross your fingers and wish me luck!

Mamma Mia

Sorry for the lack of posts recently. I'm back with my parents and I haven't been doing much.

I have had two main concerns over the last week. The first is finding a job. It has been a bit of a turmoil with companies not following up on my CV and then re-advertising - why? why? why? But the end is in sight. I've had a conditional offer from a school (the condition being that they get the business contracts they need) in an area I want to go to. Failing that, there are a couple of others who've shown interest. It has been stressful but I'm sure the right thing will appear, at the right time.

My second preoccupation is beating my dad at Wii tennis. He has reached a score of over 2000 whereas mine is stuck around 1700 BUT when we play, I tend to beat him. That's because I know his weak spots and I use distraction to keep him from concentrating - hey, who said I have to play fair?

Finally, I went to see Mamma Mia with my mum today (I love going to the cinema in the afternoon) and it made me cry. I have no idea why but I sobbed like a baby. On Sunday the cinema has a sing-along version so we're going again (with a gang of relatives - all female) to bring the house down. If you're in the Westwood area on Sunday night make sure you're wearing earplugs.

BTW, Mr Jam, when are you back from China?

Little Red Corvette (well, Polo actually)

Had a brisk start to the day. We were woken up by someone banging on our front door and ringing the doorbell. It seems our neighbours (bless their cotton socks) had noticed one of the local scrotes trying to steal my dad's car. He (the scrote) had managed to get into the car but was stopped from actually starting it up or driving it away. He did steal the front of the radio/cassette (a device so old it was kept in place with blutak) and the service record. He also left a mess in the front passenger well of papers that he'd gone through in his haste to find something worth stealing.

The estate my parents live on is not the best area in the town and there is a pretty much constant police presence, so when my dad dialled 999, the local patrol was there within a few minutes. They took the details and will be looking on the local CCTV (I said it wasn't a good area), while the lads from SOCO (the British equivalent of CSI) covered the car in fingerprint powder. At least it got us up early this morning.

In other news. I am still applying for jobs, left, right and centre. I had an interview today for a school in Puglia and I'm in two minds. The school sounds lovely but it's very small (three teachers) and in a town that shuts in the afternoon! It would also mean teaching young learners (ie. between 8 and 13) which is something I'm not at all sure about. I have to make a decision tonight, if only to allow the school to look elsewhere if necessary.

And I hate making decisions.

When you're smiling...

This is the last stretch of the last week of my time in Hampshire. I am up to my eyeballs in essays to be marked (done), marks to be input (done), grades to be agreed (tomorrow), reports to be finalised (tomorrow), bags to be packed (tomorrow), new job to be found (and have I been trying), goodbyes to be said (on Friday) and the future to look forward to (on going).

This week has been hard, not only physically (my eyes and brain are still bleeding), but also emotionally. As with all intensive courses, you get to know your students and you start to care for them. You want the best for them but you can't promote them beyond their abilities. This means that, sometimes, they are disappointed. I really don't like seeing disappointment on anyone's face, especially those who've worked hard but haven't quite got there.

I'm hopeful that the grading meeting tomorrow will sort out the wheat from the chaff (and there's not much chaff) and everyone will go home on Friday with a smile on their face.

Come on baby, light my fire...

A little excitement this evening...

There I was quietly sitting mucking about on my computer, winding down when suddenly all hell let loose.

An extremely loud howling, wailing, concussive noise started without warning. The Fire Alarm!

Stopping only to turn off my computer, grab my handbag and a fleece, out I went. The three of us huddled outside the front door (luckily it wasn't raining), protecting our ears and wondering what the blue blazes was going on.

About one hour and one technician later we were allowed back in. In that hour we'd sat in the wardens' kitchen, tried to watch television in the paint-smelling common room and ended up hanging out in the laundry room.

The reason for the alarm - it was faulty!

Back to my peaceful evening then...

Feeling good...

Holy, moly. What a week and it's only halfway over.

I've finished going through my students' essays and my eyes are so crossed, I can't see straight. You want to know how bad it is? I went out to take some photos of Winchester today and I could not get it together. I did take some pics but I have no idea what they are like.

Still, I found a manicurist to sort my nails out. I now have a French Polish and my hands look GOOOOD!

Next step, an early night (after a very disturbed night last night) and a hair rescue pack. I may even put a face pack on, who knows?

Bits and pieces...

Since I've been in Winchester, I've noticed that I'm falling to pieces. To be specific, my hair is falling out, the false nails I had put on in Melbourne have fallen off and my eyesight has deteriorated so much that I want a guide-dog.

On top of that, this week has been rather stressful with so much reading to do (hence the eyesight problems), and of such a poor quality (hence the hair falling out) that my digestive system is playing up.

I don't know what's wrong with me but at least it'll all be over soon and then I'm going to catch up on my hugs.

You have been warned!

Words, words, words...

I have been ploughing my way through my students' essays over the last couple of days. There are thirteen essays each of approximately 700 words. Really, they should only take about 20 minutes each to correct and mark but...

I feel sorry for my students. Without in any way criticising the place I work for, my students should not be here. Their level of English in not high enough for them to be able to take full advantage of what's on offer here. On top of that, they have no idea how to study. They've told me that, in China, they have many more hours of lectures, they learn what the lecturers have told them and then regurgitate it in the form of essays.

Here they only have a few hours with each of us, in which they are given a skeleton upon which they have to build. In fact, rather than giving them the essay titles to which they must write, we demand that they decide what they are going to write about, construct a title and then write the essay. This has left almost all of them totally perplexed. They have gone from being almost continually spoon-fed to being thrown in the deep end. In addition, most of them have never written more than a 250 word essay in English.

So, almost without warning, last week they had to write a 700 word essay. We did negotiate their titles but that didn't mean they fully understood what was required of them. And now I have been trying to mark them. I can only deal with one essay before my brain starts screaming for pain relief (preferably in the form of chocolate) and my eyes start bleeding.

And the worst thing is that next week they are going to give me their 1200 word essays. Is there enough chocolate in the world?

Thinking about a revolution

I'm kind of getting used to this academic life. Which is a pity as it all comes to an end in less than three weeks. I've settled into a rhythm and found my feet in this new scary classroom.

The odd thing is, though, even though I'm teaching in the UK, it feels like I'm abroad. I don't know anyone locally except those I work with, my students all speak a foreign language and those of my colleagues I don't live with have families and whole other lives. Still, at least all the magazines are in English and the on-line tv is available.

And I'm still devouring text books - next stop 'Critical Thinking'.

Two Days A Week...

Would you believe it's the end of another weeK?!?!?!

How did that happen?

Suddenly I've got two whole days of nothing to do. Hunh?

No doubt I'll find something, maybe read a book on reading, or think about critical thinking or even write a piece on writing.

See, the possibilities are endless.

In The Summertime

The British weather..., what can I tell you about the British weather (that you don't already know, that is)? While I was living with my parents, down at the seaside, it was sunny. In fact, sometimes it was so sunny that my Arabic students complained about the heat. Now that may have had more to do with there being not air-conditioning than anything else but...

Since I've moved to Winchester, it has either rained, threatened to rain or just been damp. I've been soaked, sweaty and just plain damp myself - and it hasn't been fun. I don't mind the rain (although I prefer the sun) but I do object to the continuous presence of water. Not only does it mean my towels don't dry properly after my morning shower but worse than that, my hair is a mess!

Bring back the proper British summer, that's what I say!

What I'd Say...

Can you believe it? I'm half way through week two already. Things are settling down and I'm beginning to get a grip on things. The two groups I'm teaching are potential BA students and one of them is having great difficulties with the work. However, I've talked it through with my DoS and I have a plan for the next three weeks. This makes me happy.

I'm still feeling a little out of my depth because so much depends on the students passing this course (although both of my groups will have a further five week course after I've finished with them). So, in theory, it doesn't all depend on me but I do want to do my best for them (damn, I must be turning into a proper teacher). On top of all this, I'm learning so much. Things I would have appreciated knowing before doing my DELTA (let alone my degree) - I really think I've been winging it all these years. Of course, my motto is "If you can't blind them with brains, baffle them with bullshit" which has worked quite well over the years. (OK that isn't my motto but it seemed to fit the moment).

I do have a motto but it's in Latin (I think - I got it from the internet a long, long time ago). NEMO ME IMPUNE LACESSIT. I leave it to you to work it out.

Come on, Nature

It's the end of week one and, boy, am I feeling tired. Luckily, Monday is a bank holiday so I'll be able to rest a little more. I had intended to visit G in London but after spending a couple of hours trying to plan my lessons for next week, I realised I needed a lot more time, so I'm going to plan with a colleague on Sunday. The idea is to plan for the whole week and draft out the following week so that during the week we can just tweak it to suit our students.

I'm beginning to love my students (in a purely platonic way), they are becoming more adventurous and, I think, are starting to trust me. Unfortunately, my other group are like sacks of potatoes. I have never known such an unresponsive group in all my teaching career. Even when I ask them questions directly, using their names, they either avoid my eye or mumble something incoherent. They also like to hide behind their dictionaries (which are electronic and therefore translate everything into Chinese for them).

Things got so bad today that we had the 'talk', the one in which I use my special teacher voice (sometimes it even scares me), about them listening when I'm talking, concentrating on the task at hand, and asking questions if they don't understand what to do. I know it's not just me as the other two tutors have said they have similar problems. How these students managed to get a test score high enough to convince anyone they could function in an English language academic situation is beyond me. However, people do perform differently in test conditions, especially if they have been trained to do the test. This is one of the things that make language learning so difficult. Anyone can learn a few set phrases and questions but how do you deal with the response from a native speaker who will almost certainly not use complete and grammatically correct sentences, and will use lots of idiomatic expressions?

In completely different news, my mouse has stopped working. The cursor will go up and down but not side to side. Oh dear, I guess that means I'll have to buy a new one (one that doesn't need a mouse mat and has a special roller function - life is hard).

Weather update - believe it or not, the sun was shining as I walked to work today. But it was still raining, big ploppy drops. Not enough for a rainbow but enough to dampen my enthusiasm!

Rainy Day Woman

I noticed that none of you tried to answer my question. Not so easy is it? Still we hammered that one today and, hopefully, it means I'll see less and less nonsensical writing. I met my other group of students today, the ones I'm doing Academic Reading with and they are even quieter than my Writing group - how is this possible??? I only see this group for four sessions a week so I don't know how well I'm going to get to know them but I'm hoping that once I've got their names under control (and most of them have westernised names) things will become easier. Unfortunately I'm still at the point and 'you' stage (which I hate). I also received a pleasant surprise today, one of my Writing group gave me a little present - a Chinese dangley (like the things you attach to your phone). It's embroidered and mainly orange so perfectly replaces the pull tag that came off my favourite (orange) handbag.

Other news - I went into Southampton to get my ID card this afternoon and the journey back was anything but straightforward. Also I'm going to change my accommodation - I'm moving in with the other tutors as there are fewer people and a cleaner kitchen in their flat. I planned to do it this evening but...

Rain update - Winchester is still in gold medal position AND, somehow, the showers always manage to co-incide with my needing to be outside. Why?

Singing in the rain (not)

So, day two is over and I've done my first real teaching of this course. Was it wildly successful? Not really but we still have to get used to each other.

Most of my students are Chinese and Taiwanese and none of them have been to the UK before. The culture shock must be enormous. For example, we were talking about different types of writing today and I mentioned blogs (and that I had one). They mainly just looked stunned - and I've only just remembered how much censorship there is in China, even I've been deemed 'unacceptable' on occasion and I'm soooo innocent (honestly).

They will loosen up and I will calm down and we'll meet somewhere in the middle. In the meantime I'm getting involved in planning lessons at a level of detail I haven't used since doing my DELTA.

Two more things - it keeps on raining - what is it with Winchester? It is going for the Olympic Rainfall Gold Medal?

And here's a question I've been grappling with: "Just what is a sentence?"

Feed me Seymour....

Day One (proper) of the new job. Actually got to meet some students today although they weren't necessarily the ones I'm going to be teaching. A ten minute interview in the morning followed by an afternoon of planning (with the recurring fear that I have no idea what I'm doing) and finishing with a Welcome Party in the evening.

In reality, that meant three million very tired students (some of them only arrived at midnight last night and haven't slept for 24 hours) scrambling for the buffet and getting to know each other while we teachers elbowed our way (gracefully) to the food and then stood talking to each other.

Tomorrow, teaching commences and I fully expect to be both exhausted and exhilarated this time tomorrow night.

Until then my lovelies...

I am what I am

Today was my first day at my new job and, unlike my previous teaching jobs, it has been all about the talk. Don't get me wrong, I'm not criticizing the process, it's just, as I Said, different.

Usually, when you join an EFL school, the induction consists of lots of 'getting to know you', moving around reading little pieces of paper (aka mingle activities), brainstorming and occasionally poster producing. All invigorating and reflecting the way we are supposed to teach (even if I sometimes find such activities embarrassing and childish). Here it has been much more grown-up. Mainly sitting, listening, asking questions and reading information which, I hazard, reflects the teaching method (we are at a university after all).

My head is buzzing with so much information and, to tell the truth, I am a little scared of what I am expected to do. However, I can only do my best and the support here seems very good.

As they say, that which doesn't kill us, makes us stronger.

Update 10th August

My lovelies

It's been so long since we've spoken, and it's all my fault. I've become lazy and commplacent, living with my parents.

What have I been up to? Well, I've been teaching near beginners (mainly from Arabic countries) and sulky teenagers (from Spain and Poland). The beginners I enjoyed - lots of laughter and silly voices (mine) - but the teenagers, not so much, the privilege is entirely lost on them, all they see is the loss of their summer holiday. Would I have been different at their age? I doubt it. But even so I wanted to shake them for being so spoilt.

Anyhow, next week I'm off to Winchester for five weeks teaching post-graduate students how to write academic essays. I don't know how much fun it will be but I do know how much more lucrative it will be and how much it will enhance my CV.

And I will be living in student halls of residence which will remind me of living in hostels so hopefully the blog will take off again,

Until then my lovelies

Ciao

The best things in life...

Ok, here's the truth. I've spent most of the last week (when I wasn't actually working) uploading the remaining photos from my trip. I'm on my last memory card now and I hope to be done be the end of the weekend (give or take).

In the meantime I have been trying to write new posts especially the promised top tens but it has been difficult. Is it really fair to compare across countries ie is it fair to compare hostels in Ecuador with hostels in Australia? And the wildlife - how do you pick the best wildlife you've seen, eh? well, tell me, how do you?

I love llamas (even though they can be mean, spitty beasts) but I also love Koalas (even though all they do is eat and sleep - and occasionally make new Koalas). How can one be better than the other?

Now do you see my dilemma?

Bear with me, I will resolve this conundrum or die trying (or give up)

Ciao lovelies.

On Travellers

It seems to me that there are various types of travellers:

The 'Old Hand'

Everywhere you've been, they've already been there (and had better, more thrilling experiences than you) and, god, do their stories go on and on and on.
Everywhere you're going, they've decided against because it's too commercial, too backpacker-y, not authentic enough.


The neophytes

This is the first time they've really travelled and they are doing it on daddy's dollar. They think staying in backpacker hostels is an 'experience' (daddy paid for a hotel for the first week). They travel in packs and go everywhere recommended by the guidebook. They look for others of the same ilk to compare experiences, just to check they´re doing it all and doing it properly.


The experienced traveller

You can identify these people by the state of their things. Generally aged, repaired and used (and that's just the backpack). They arrive at the hostel with food in a bag, settle in immediately and chat to absolutely everyone.


The single traveller

These are really two groups. The younger group tends to be male and is always up for a good time. He's on his own because the trip to Marbella booked by his mates just didn't excite him and he's already done the Australia/New Zealand thing but he'd still like the booze and birds experience - watch out any young female travellers. The older group tends to be female. Women who are divorced or just pissed off with the family holiday. They want to do more with their lives than the wife/mother thing and this is their opportunity. They start off being very organised, with everything booked in advanced, knowing what they are going to do at every step along the way but this drops off after a month and they start to follow their hearts. The neat, clean and tidy image falls away and the earth woman comes through (but they still believe in good personal hygiene).


The family group

This could be parents with young children or an older group of adults. Generally, the parents avoid hostels as too noisy or not particularly child-friendly. However, encounters on trips are fraught with screaming children while their parents wonder if bringing the kids was really such a good option and surely six weeks with the grandparents wouldn't have done them any harm. The parents always look knackered and the children are more interested in their video games than the natural splendours surrounding them. Meanwhile the older group of adults are very civilised with packed lunches, extra layers and a selection of guidebooks. They like organised trips as it saves them the bother but they stay away from the parents (because last year, it was them looking after the kids for six weeks while the parents took off).


The Pack

Generally a group of friends who go everywhere together. A group is at least two people (logical, I suppose) but they are always looking for others to join them. The average female group is three to five 'girls' and consists of the 'popular' one who everyone clusters around, the 'leader' who actually makes all the decisions and the 'other' one who generally does all the work/speaks the local language. No matter how many there are in the group, these three exist and are the nucleus of the group. Of all of them, the 'popular' one is the most annoying as she has no concept of other peoples' needs, thinking nothing of bursting into a dorm at 5am to wake her friends (and everyone else in the room) because if she's up so must they be. The average male group consists of four lads who think they are being adventurous by travelling outside of Europe. However, despite travelling halfway around the world they spend their time with the other members of the group, watching television, talking about football and drinking beer then going to the pub to drink more beer, act like dickheads and (if they're lucky) pull one of the girls. The lads usually spend the morning sleeping off their hangover and complaining how broke/grotty/ill they feel.

The behaviour of groups does depend on their nationality. Generally the Anglo-saxons travelling in South America are more reserved than Latin cultures but in Australia (and I would guess other English speaking countries) they are the loudest, rudest and most inconsiderate.


The Couple

This could be any combination of two people but generally these two are in an intimate relationship (as opposed to two friends travelling together). Couples travel together for a variety of reasons but mainly (if unconsciously) to test their relationship. You can tell a couple a mile off. Initially, they tend to isolate themselves from those around them, eating together, going out together, sitting next to each other on excursions, talking only to other couples. However, after a few weeks, you can see the signs of desperation as one of the couple seeks out other people to talk to. Often the other person will come and fetch their errant partner not being comfortable with said partner finding stimulation elsewhere. However, a few weeks more and both are chatting away to other people, coming together for meals and entertainment to swap stories and information. Couples at this stage can be the best people to meet because they understand the value of sharing information without trying to outdo anyone.


The techno-traveller

Again this is split into two sub-species. The first is the photographer. This person sees the world through the photolens. Generally they carry a big bag with two or three camera bodies and a selection of lenses. The problem with this is not the cameras but the bag itself. These bags have minds of their own and while you are jostling for position, they swing into action - blocking your view, knocking you to one side, jogging your elbow - while their owner lines up the perfect shot. During the 'down' part of the trip (ie travelling from one hotspot to another), instead of enjoying the scenery, the photographer is going through his shots (because, of course, everything is digital) and deleting the few that don't quite meet his high standards.

The other sub-species is the laptopper. This person cannot travel without their laptop and will select accomodation according to the availability of wi-fi. Any other media (photographs, video, sound recordings) are immediately transferred to the laptop for worldwide distribution. Interestingly, while the photographer is a solitary species, the laptopper likes to gather a crowd around himself while he exhibits his media, his laptop capabilities and his importance in the world in general. The laptopper usually has a loud and boring voice.

I'm sorry, so sorry

My dears, what can I say? It's been way too long since I last spoke to you and that's entirely because I've been such a busy bee.

Just a quick update: I arrived back in the UK at 7pm on Thursday 5th June. I spent Friday and Saturday sorting out computers, unpacking and generally catching up with my beloved parents. On Sunday we had a family barbecue (which was accompanied by the most glorious, hot and sunny day since the British summer began).

On Monday I started work. Yes, that quickly. I went straight into full time work - after a break of six months! To say I've been exhausted is putting it lightly. However, I'm beginning to get my head together so, hopefully, posting will resume.

Don't give up on me and I won't give up on you. Next installment... travellers!

La Dolce Vita

Ah, Italia, bella Italia.

So many small irritations but many more superb pleasures.

It's good to be back.

Rounding up

My last trip in Australia was along the Great Ocean Road which actually circumnavigates the continent of Australia, more thousands of kilometres than I care to contemplate. We went about 500km in one (twelve hour) day but it was worth it.

On the way we saw wild koala sitting quietly in their gently swaying trees (photos will follow), and then up the coastline to the Apostles and various other rock formations formed when the cliffs are washed away.

It was a good way to finish my Australia adventure and gave me time to reflect on that part of my journey.

Some time soon I'm going to do a "top ten/best of/worst of" of my journey covering such important things as hostels, food, transport, landscape and activities, then I'll start adding information to my photos (on flickr - go there now!) and reposting about various things. Finally, when I've bored you senseless, I'll move onto something else.

Until then, Ciao

On Flying with Singapore Airlines

Do!

Ok, I can't leave it at that. The service is excellent (even though I didn't get an upgrade - I was brave enough to ask, so that's a first).

First flight - Melbourne to Singapore (7 hours)
We left Melbourne at 10:10 and arrived in Singapore at 15:30 (two hours back).
I had booked an aisle seat as I prefer being able to get up and wander at will. If you're flying I suggest you go here to see the layout of your plane and to pick a good seat. It also meant there was only one person sitting next to me and all she wanted to do was sleep - result! I'd also pre-ordered my meals - gluten free - which meant I was served before anyone else and could eat in peace. Even if you don't have any special dietry needs, I would recommend your doing this.

So, once you're on the plane you get hot towels, then a drink and peanuts along with your headphones for the on-demand entertainment (I watched "I am Legend", "St Trinians" and "27 Dresses"). After lunch we were given an ice-cream then more hot towels to clean ourselves. Regular offers of water and/or orange juice ensured nobody dehydrated and the mid-afternoon 'snack' was excellent.

Changi Airport, Singapore (7 hours stopover)
After much strong thought (and, therefore, headaches) I had chosen not to continue immediately with the second leg of my journey but to have a stopover. I'd heard from various sources that Changi airport is considered the best in the world and I can see why. Clean, spacious, frequent well-considered helpdesks (don't forget I was in transit), free internet, free movie theatre, lots of duty-free shops (yes, I succumbed) and, most importantly for me, a transit lounge and hotel. I booked into the hotel for six hours (£24) got a room to myself with a queen-sized bed, stripped and slept for five hours. Showered and feeling fresh I checked-in for the second leg. No problems at all.

Second Flight - Singapore to Milan (12 hours)
We left Changi at 23:45 and arrived in Milan at 06:45 (six hours back).
Same as before but with an added bonus for me. I was in the aisle seat of three. The man in the middle seat wanted to connect his blackberry to the on-demand entertainment system so that he could access the internet (amazing what you can do nowadays) but it wasn't working. So he asked to be moved. The cabin crew found somewhere for him AND his wife, leaving the two seats next to me completely empty! For the entire flight I had the benefit of three seats, no-one asking me to let them out and I could (and did) lay down across all three to sleep during the night. This meant it didn't matter that the people in front reclined their seats as much as possible as soon as possible. In addition to the food and snacks we were also given a goodie bag containing a pair of socks and a toothbrush with toothpaste. There were spare ones in the toilet along with combs, one of which I nabbed. And the blankets, made of polar fleece, were sized for adult human beings (instead of the cabbagepatch doll sized ones normally supplied).

I arrived in Milan feeling bright-eyed and bushy-tailed, was met by M who whisked me off to his new house. I managed to stay awake until mid-afternoon when I took a short nap but I was a very bad guest later, falling asleep while he cooked dinner and not waking up until midnight (bad Shiralee, slap on the wrist).

So, overall, if you can afford it (and this was no more costly than any of the other airlines flying this route) I would heartily recommend Singapore Airlines. My economy class experience was fantastic so heavens alone know what the business/first class is like.

Limbo

I cannot believe it is so long since I last wrote, but in my defense I have to say that time has been passing really quickly lately, especially as I have crossed several time zones. I am now in Italy, having travelled back to Australia from New Zealand, then here via Singapore.

I can't quite describe how I'm feeling at the moment, sort of in limbo I guess. I know real life will be kicking in soon, as I have to start working again and I have to find a job from the autumn. I've been putting off considering it but now it's time to take a deep breath and shoulder my responsibilities.

Over the next few days I'll be writing about the remainder of my experiences and impressions of where I've been and what I've done these last six months but at the moment it all seems a bit much.

The lion sleeps tonight...

So let's see, what have I been doing since we last spoke?

Firstly, I encountered some stalkers. It was one of the funniest things I've ever seen (although I'm sure you'd be horrified, mum). I was in Paihia which is a coastal town with a long sandy beach and, like all such places, it has a road with pavements along the top of the beach. The beach itself slopes down to the sea leaving the road about twenty feet higher than the water so as the wind comes off the sea, it rises over the land. Also, like all these places, Paihia has a lot of seagulls. There are two main species there: a smallish herring gull (similar to those found in the UK) and a larger brown speckled one - don't ask me for any more details, you know I'm hopeless when it comes to birds.

Ok, enough of the back story. I was walking back to the hostel along the beach road when I noticed two seagulls hovering, riding the wind, about ten foot above the pavement. They were using all their skills to remain in the same place, turning on the air currents and wheeling away and returning to the same spot if necessary. As I drew closer, I saw a woman standing on the beach, reading one of the notice boards. As I walked past, I looked more closely and realised that she was eating a bag of chips (hot, salty and yummy smelling). She was completely oblivious to the seagulls who'd positioned themselves behind her with a view to raiding/picking up any dropped chips. I stood and watched for a few minutes (the seagulls control was amazing) until she turned and saw me, at which point I brought her attention to the stalkers. Not being sure they were stalking her, the woman started walking along the road - and the seagulls followed her. I almost wet myself as I watched (and was thankful I was eating ice-cream).

Now, I know what you're thinking - nasty, evil, greedy birds (should be shot etc. etc.). What I'd like to point out is that they are smart, adaptable and lovely to watch (although I'll concede their cry leaves a lot to be desired). How many other animals do you know that can plan and execute such a manouvre?

Then I went to Auckland for two nights and met up with a friend for pizza (yummy). I stayed in a lovely hostel, marred only by the slug who hogged the tv. A local man who'd moved out of his accommodation into the hostel for a 'holiday' and spent almost all of his time asleep on one of the sofas with the remote control clutched in his hand, near to his crotch. As you can imagine, no-one was willing to try and get it off him. However, the woman in charge had no such inhibitions and made it clear that, when other people were in the room, he had to relinquish control of the control.

Finally, last night I went to bed early(ish) because I had to get up at 2:45am in order to be ready for the shuttle bus taking me to the airport. I had a 6:15am flight, which means being at the airport at 4:15am which means... now do you understand? The flight was smooth and arrived on time, and I had no problems getting to the hostel - I've even got a bottom bunk.

Today I'm doing admin stuff - laundry, shopping, collecting the stuff that J&D's friend has been looking after for me, unpacking, repacking and deciding what I need to send via freight and what I need to throw away. And all this while feeling pretty exhausted. Still I'll sleep well tonight.

What becomes of the broken hearted...

I am not happy. I went out to see the dolphins today (for the second time, I'll have you know) and they weren't in. Seems they'd had a better offer somewhere else or maybe the sea was too rough for them or maybe the sea was too calm for them or maybe they'd heard about the orca in the area and just decided to hide. I don't know. What I do know is that I haven't seen hide nor hair of a bloody dolphin throughout all my travels (yes, I know they don't have hair - let's just concentrate on my disappointment here, OK!).

This is the fourth time I've attempted to see (let alone swim with) dolphins. The first time, in Akaroa, the boat didn't go out because of bad weather. The second time, in Kaikora, the boat didn't go out because of bad weather (although the whale watching boat did go out). The third and fourth times have been here in Paihia where the dolphins deigned not to appear. I believe I am dolphin-jinxed and shall be adopting an attitude of "I don't care, who needs to see/swim with dolphins anyway!" whilst secretly crying myself to sleep.

I do have a voucher which entitles me to a free trip with the same company I've been out with twice already but, as I leave here tomorrow and the weather forecast is for even rougher seas, somehow I doubt I'll be taking them up on that offer. Having said that, the voucher is valid indefinitely so when I finally win the lottery and come back here, maybe I'll get to use it. Until then... damn you, you dolphins, how dare you be so cute and intelligent and how dare you play hard to get - you've broken (only slightly) my heart.

She'll be coming round the mountains...

I've had a mixed day. This morning I went out over the bay of Paihia (in the Bay of Islands area) in a HELICOPTER!!!!

It was only a twenty minute flight but it was well worth it. I've seen the land from the water and the water from the water but seeing the land and the water from the air is something else. The copter was remarkably steady with less movement than an old train, except when crossing from water to land when the uprising winds create a small amount of turbulence. I was sitting in the front seat next to the pilot and had a grand view of everything - there was even a hole in the roof to look through (but no sticking any part of your body out anywhere).

Then this afternoon I went on a swimming with dolphins cruise. Only there weren't any dolphins. I think I'm jinxed. I tried to swim with dolphins in Akaroa but there was a nasty storm (hail and snow). I tried again in Kaikora but there were high winds. Now I've tried again in Paihia and the dolphins decided not to show themselves. However, as we didn't see any dolphins or whales I got a voucher to repeat the trip, so I'm going again on Monday - keep your fingers crossed for me.

As I'm coming to the end of my long trip home, I find I'm less and less worried about doing things and thinking more and more about what I want to do next. I think I've seen all the wildlife (except dolphins) that I can stand, all the landscape my brains can remember and all the activities my body can cope with. Having said that I might try skydiving before I leave the southern hemisphere, who knows?

Polly put the kettle on...

I love hot water. When you've been travelling as long as I have, and some people travel a lot longer (two years is the record amongst those I've met), you come to appreciate the small things in life. Things like hot water. Do you realise just how much hot water you use? Every time you wash your hands, cook food (in water, obviously) or make a cup of tea (yes, mum I'm talking to you). Not to mention washing your clothes, heating your house (what did you think was in those radiators?) and having a shower. Nowadays, we tend to take it for granted but I can still remember boiling a kettle as a child to have hot water to wash in (and I'm not ashamed of the memory).

Here in Rotorua, however, it isn't the absence of hot water that's the problem. Rather, it's the over-abundance. This whole area is one big hotspot (pun intended) of geothermal activity. That means earthquakes, volcanoes, boiling mud and hot springs. The other thing that comes with geothermal activity is geysers (how do you say it - guyzers or geezers?). Geysers are wonderful to look at and even if the water is superheated as it comes out, it's almost cold if it sprays over you and it leaves your skin feeling soft (maybe because it's slightly acidic or alkali, depending on the other minerals around, and has taken the top layer of your skin off!). The hot springs are more varied. Some are so hot that they will take more than the top layer off if you're not careful. Others, however, are more gentle. Like the one I soaked my feet in yesterday or the one I'm going to bathe in tomorrow.

As well as being hot, the area is smelly. With geothermal activity comes sulphur (at least in this area) and with sulphur comes bad smells. Remember stink bombs? Sulphur. Bad eggs? Sulphur. Burnt popcorn? Sulphur. It does look pretty though and brings up many other minerals in it's wake. Thus we have bright yellow rock, orange rock, red rock, blue rock and green rock.

Unfortunately, after a while the smell gets to you. You think you've got used to it and you're enjoying the beautiful surroundings when, suddenly, BAM right across the nose comes that sulphur smell. It hasn't been too bad for me (mainly burnt popcorn) but some of the others here have been unable to eat and feel constantly nauseaous - even I was feeling queasy when I went to the local "Thermal Wonderland". Maybe they should market it as a weight loss centre!

The Kitchen Thief

After telling you all about my problems with socks, we had a rather nasty incident at the hostel I was staying in. There was an Australia/New Zealand rugby match and the hostel was screening it in the bar. The bar and the cafe of that hostel are open to the public, and the guest kitchen is just off the cafe eating area. In other words, it's also open to the general public but as a guest you don't think about that.

I was in there, talking to my new dorm mate when suddenly we heard a woman shouting "Give me my wallet back". We both turned to look and saw a woman arguing with a man. Sadly, both of us thought it was a domestic (unfortunatly they aren't rare, generally a woman travelling with a man who spends his evenings in the bar, runs out of money and raids her funds) and turned away. However, another guy (Canadian) saw what was happening more clearly and went to her aid. It turned out that the man was a thief who (with a lady friend) had cased the area, seen her purse unattended (she'd literally turned away for as long as it takes to fill a cup with water) and put it in his pocket. She's turned back just in time to see this hence the "Give me back my wallet".

Outside of the guest kitchen, in the cafe eating area were about twenty rugby players who'd come to eat before watching the match. Once the thief realised he wouldn't be able to get pass them with the woman and the Canadian demanding her wallet back, he turned nasty, threatening her with a plate then shoving her and making a break. The woman had seen him around before and thought he worked at the hostel so went and reported him to reception. That's when she discovered that he had nothing to do with the hostel! However, he was caught on CCTV and the police were called. She had to go to the police station the next day to make a formal statement and, obviously, was very shaken up. The daft thing is that she blamed herself saying that she shouldn't have left her purse unattended for even a minute.

It was obvious from this man's behaviour that this was a deliberate act, choosing a time when the hostel would be full of strangers, knowing that no-one would question his presence in the guest kitchen and waiting until there were only four of us in the kitchen before making his move. I hope the police catch him (although what would happen I don't know).

Overall, it opened my eyes. I had become quite lax about leaving things around in hostels in Australia and New Zealand (but not, in all honesty, in South America) but not now. Now my bag is across my shoulder and my purse tucked away. I've been very lucky so far. Although my bag was slashed in Puno (nothing was taken as I had a kilo of grapes in it) and some socks have gone walkies, nothing like this has happened. Let's hope nothing does.

Walking on the moon

Socks.

Such mundane articles and yet mine keep going missing. My beautiful, lined, proper walking socks (given to me by U) were liberated while I was in the Galapagos Islands, several pairs of my brown foot socks have gone for a walk and now the white ones I bought in Melbourne have disappeared. So I was forced to go shopping, after all, there is only so much walking you can do with the wrong socks. I now have three new pairs of thick calf-length socks with which to swathe my feet and reduce the wear and tear of walking around the city/wildlife sanctuary/museum etc. (I also bought a couple of men's vests for warmth but that's another matter).

In the meantime, here in Wellington, the weather has improved - so much so that I don't have to wear a vest, long-sleeved t-shirt, jumper, fleece and raincoat. Now I can leave the jumper and raincoat behind!

New Zealand is completely different from Australia (OK, I admit it, I thought they'd be the same except for the scenery). The accent, the attitude, everything - it damn well is a different country but one that I'd recommend visiting.

Postman Pat, Postman Pat...

I don't know if I've told you... I'm in New Zealand, land of "Xena, Warrior Princess", "Hercules", "King Kong" and, of course, "Lord of the Rings". I flew into Christchurch in the district of Canterbury (sound familiar?) on Wednesday evening and haven't really stopped since. A day of organising stuff then off again. On Friday I went to Akaroa on the Banks Peninsula. I had hoped to swim with dolphins, walk amongst trees and chill out. I started the walking then it started hailing, big time. Didn't bother with the dolphins as nothing was going out on the sea. It rained practically non-stop through to Saturday afternoon but I didn't let this stop me. You see, I'd booked to go out with the Mail run on Saturday morning - rain or no rain. So I turned up, was given the option of going (as the weather was so bad we might not be able to see much from the summits), decided to go anyway and off we went. The postie did her stuff (they also deliver newspapers), we stopped at a cheese factory (yes, of course I bought some cheese - this is me we're talking about), then later we stopped for morning tea in a church (home made muffins, I think - very welcome). We went to the top of the 'mountains' and down to the beach, I got to see most of the bays and some stunning scenery. I almost got blown over by the wind, the rain and hail semi-soaked me and a good time was had.

When I got back to the hostel, I realised I'd left my cheese in the postie's van (actually a 4WD because of the threat of snow on the summits) so went charging up to the post office. She hadn't returned there yet but another postie (Paul) took me up to where she was, I picked up my cheese and then Paul drove me back to the hostel - incredible and unexpected kindness! Lunch was cheese and crackers, sitting listening to the rain but by mid afternoon it had cleared slightly, so I walked to the other end of the village and went to the cinema.

Now, the cinema... From the outside it looks like a village hall. Inside there is a cafe (serving good food and drinks) and two, yes two, screens. I saw "Death at a Funeral" a good British film in Cinema 2. Now I've been in some odd cinemas in my life. The arthouse cinema in Plymouth where we sat on plastic chairs trying to peer around each other, the massive single screen cinema in Cairo where there were eight foreigners, six drinks salesmen (who kept standing between us and the screen) and three armed police officers (still not sure if they were there to protect us or prevent us rioting after watching a foreign film), the huge multiplex in Poland with more screens than good films to fill them, but this cinema, this one in Akaroa, is by far the best I've ever been to.

The seats are wide and comfortable. You can take your drink (hot or cold, alcoholic or not) in with you, there are armrests for your drinking vessel (I took in a pot of tea). The place wasn't in total blackout (one of my pet hates - why do people want to sit in the dark and watch films?) but, best of all, there were only SEVENTEEN seats. In fact my being there almost caused a problem when a couple turned up and there was only one seat left (nobody had counted on a tourist wanting to go to the cinema) but they squeezed in. A wonderfully civillised way to pass a rainy Saturday afternoon and the sun was setting as we left.

Up early again on Sunday to catch the bus back to Christchurch and then the coach onto Kaikora on the eastern coast of the southern island. I had booked dolphin swimming and whale watching here but it's done nothing but rain again and the dolphin swimming was cancelled. Hopefully the whale watching will go ahead, otherwise it's going to be a long day in the hostel watching tv and reading badly written books.

Tomorrow I move onto Wellington on the north island (bus then ferry). I'm hoping to go swimming with dolphins up off the north island so keep your fingers crossed for me.

Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, busy bee, busy bee...

Well, I finally made it to New Zealand. It's just a short hop across the Tasman Sea but I had to fly via Sydney which added a few hours onto the trip. I was shocked to find I had to take a train between the domestic and international terminals at Sydney and pay $5.20 for the privilege!

When I got to the hostel (one of the type I hate, with a pub/nightclub on the ground floor) I checked-in and went to my dorm. There were four other women there but one of them was 'keeping' a bottom bunk for her friend who was due to arrive at some time. Feeling somewhat tired and bolshy, I decided that that wasn't on and promptly moved the 'keeping' bag to the upper bunk and moved into the lower bunk. There were two young Americans in the room and they thought there would be a ruckus but the truth is I was asleep when the others finally arrived and everything passed off fine this morning.

I have been very organised this morning and booked all my trips for the next few days including whale-watching, swimming with dolphins and the Eastern Bay Scenic Mail Run. I've also booked my flight back from Italy to the UK - check out my 30boxes calendar for details.

This afternoon I'll be wandering around Christchurch but I have to say that my impressions last night (on the shuttle bus from the Airport) were "Hmmm, how very British". The temperature is about 10-15 degrees cooler than Cairns so I'm wearing my fleece again and, you know what?, I kind of like it.

Who's a pretty boy, then?

I've now uploaded all the photos I took while snorkelling on the GBR. There are many that are fuzzy and out of focus, many that seem to contain nothing except water and even a couple with a horrible blue-skinned monster wearing goggles and a mask - you have been warned.

This, however, is my favourite photo, you can see the Parrot fish just about to launch an attack on the coral.



The Parrot fish is so-named, not because it imitates human speech, but for it's brightly hued skin and pointy mouth. As you can imagine, if it eats coral it must have teeth and a good strong bite - I wouldn't want to get in its way!

I'm walking on sunshine...

Hello again

Sorry I've not updated for a couple of days but I've been busy doing things. Such as rainforest walks, beach walks, walking where the rainforest meets the great barrier reef across a white sand beach - you know the sort of thing I mean.

I went up the coast to Port Douglas and Cape Tribulation for a few days and snorkelled on the GBR a couple of times more. I finally found Nemo but I didn't have a camera so I couldn't papp him. I did hire a camera later so I'll be uploading loads of fuzzy, out of focus, empty of fish, underexposed photos at some point. The problem is I'm both short and long sighted (stupid, I know) so when I wear a prescription mask for long-sightedness I can see the fish and coral much more clearly but I can't see what's showing on the camera screen - there's a lot of guesswork involved!

In the latest news from here, I've finally booked my flight back to Europe. I'll be flying into Milan on the morning of 28th May, just over a month from now and then onto the UK a couple of weeks after that.

On Wednesday I fly to New Zealand for three weeks. And here's the ridiculous thing, I didn't really want to visit Australia as it didn't appeal to me that much. I really, really wanted to visit New Zealand and see the magnificent scenery, chill out in the small hospitable towns and bathe in the hot springs. What has actually happened is that I've spent about six or seven weeks in Australia (nowhere near enough) and I'll only be spending three weeks in New Zealand. Isn't life weird?

I'll be shipping my souveniers while I'm in Melbourne (before I fly out) and they'll probably arrive a few weeks after I do so it'll be like revisiting the holiday all over again.

In the meantime, people, make sure the sun starts shining in Europe as I don't want to be cold when I get there!

Poetry in motion...

I'm in Port Douglas, just a couple of hours (and a 20% increase in humidity) north of Cairns. This is where the rich and famous hang out - not that I've seen anyone rich or famous yet... maybe they look just like you and me???

Today I went koala and 'roo hunting, not literally hunting as I don't believe in that sort of thing and I didn't actually have to 'go' anywhere except the local wildlife sanctuary (The Rainforest Habitat) but I stroked and scratched a koala (and had my photo taken with him) then followed some kangaroos around their paddock.

Kangaroos are actually one of a group of animals called Macropods (literally 'big foot'). The group includes Kangaroos (Red, Eastern Grey, Western Grey and Tree Kangaroos - I kid you not, they climb trees), Wallabies (Black, White, Red-necked, Striped, Bushy-tailed, Nail-tail), Bettongs, Pademelons and Potoroos. Some are little bigger than a rabbit and others as tall as me with all variations in between. The one thing they have in common is how cute they are.

While I was sitting by their feeding station waiting for the Emus to stop hogging the food, something set the 'roos off and I was lucky enough to see them bounding from one side of the paddock to the other, through the trees and around the water (don't be mislead by the word paddock, they have plenty of room). Interestingly enough, most of the time they do this four legged thing whereby they lean on their forepaws and bring their hind legs up, dragging their tails behind them but when they hop, they are poetry in motion.

I also saw a shedload of birds and some crocodiles and had a couple of excellent (and free) guided tours. The whole thing was well worth the money.

Bad news for the day, though, is that I can't find the USB cable for my camera so I won't be uploading any photos for a while. Good news, though, is that I've got all those memory cards I bought for the Galapagos Islands - about 1,000 photos worth so let's hope New Zealand isn't too pretty!

Bobbing along, bobbing along on the bottom of the beautiful, briney sea...

Today I went to the Great Barrier Reef. Well, to be honest, only one island in the Great Barrier Reef which, in total, is 2,300 km long (so I couldn't do it all even if I wanted to - could you imagine how wrinkled my fingers would be at the end of it?).

The island is called Normanby Island and is part of the Frankland Islands. Normanby Island was originally a coral reef which was dstroyed through natural causes, the coral decayed to sand and other soil, vegetation floated in (or was carried by birds) and an island was born. It is still surrounded by coral reef, both soft and hard coral and, of course, where you get coral you get fish. Parrot fish (very colourful and seem to use their fins like wings), damsel fish (small, bright blue and very easily scared), sweetlips fish (with Mick Jagger's mouth), box fish (very square) and fusilliers (the first in there when there's food to be had).

I also saw a turtle resting on the coral and, during the island walk, held a spiney starfish (long, thin, Jerry Hall legs) and barnacle covered crab (small but with sharp feet). We even saw a whole host of sea cucumbers (which don't look at all like cucumbers).

In the afternoon I went snorkelling on my own and I now believe the art of a good snorkel is floating silently. Once you've been there for a couple of minutes the locals ignore you and swim around you, up close and personal, seeing you as just another animal to be avoided. I didn't take my camera today as I wanted a photo-free day (sometimes you just have to stop seeing the world through the lens) but the next time I go out to the GBR I will be taking one of those disposable underwater cameras.

Next time I actually hope to find Nemo.