New Year's Resolutions

I know, I know, it's not the new year. But, it kind of is.

We're in the middle of winter here (albeit not a very cold winter) and we've just had a two week holiday. For me this was a time to catch my breath, think about what has happened since I arrived here and what I want to do next.

Over the last couple of years I have been through some serious stuff. I've fallen in love and realised the love isn't returned (not that it stops my feelings), spent the best part of a year doing a professional qualification (part of which I have to repeat), bought a house (which I'm in the process of selling) and moved continents.

So my two week break was an opportunity to reflect, to think about what I've been doing with my life and what I want from the future. Some of these things are attainable and some are not. Those that are, I have to pursue; those that aren't, I have to accept.

Work: I really, really love teaching. However, I'm starting to hate the paperwork which surrounds it even though I don't have a problem doing it as such (years as an administrator taught me many shortcuts). Interestingly, the paperwork here isn't that onerous but it is repetitive. Also, I teach a lot of exam classes which means marking a lot of written work - incredibly boring. (Sorry, but when you've read one essay about crime, the thought of reading and marking another twelve is so not inviting - and I'm lucky, my students have a high level of English). So:

Resolution Number 1
Mark homework within two days of receiving it

Resolution Number 2
Do the paperwork little and often

Money: The salary here is poor. The idea of saving to travel is a little ridiculous. We do receive a bonus every six months (of about half our monthly salary or 6/12th's) but because we'd only be here since the beginning of March, this time we received 4/12th's which was fair enough. Unfortunately this was barely enough to cover bus fares, let alone accomodation, food, souvenirs etc. The net effect of this was that the cushion of money I bought with me has disappeared. Luckily, when I got back from holiday, I started teaching my private student (a lovely man btw). I had planned to save the money he pays me towards the long holiday but instead I've had to live on it. I am very good a living on a tight budget (I've been living in a cash economy for six years now) so I've adapted BUT I don't like it. I do object to just getting by. I need to save money for new clothes, shoes etc. Also I do want to go to Patagonia in December, if only for a few days. So:

Resolution Number 3
Work out and live on a budget that will allow me to do the things I want to and save for the 'summer' holiday

Health: This covers a whole multitude of things. What I eat, and when; exercise; sleeping; my emotional state. To take them in order.

Eating: as a teacher, my work hours are odd and if I don't get the timing right I can end up going for many hours without food, then I get cranky and end up eating the wrong food (biscuits - readily available, free of charge) which leads to sugar cravings etc. etc. I'm sure you've all been there. Also, I'm a lazy cow. I don't particularly like cooking so I've never developed any form of expertise. I like quick and easy. Sometimes this is good - salad in a bag plus ham/cheese plus olive oil, hey presto! dinner. Sometimes this is not so good - takeaway pizza.

Generally the problem isn't in the evening, it's during the day. I have tried to avoid sandwiches (me and bread don't make a good combination) but lately I've been slipping back in the old, old bad habits (sandwiches and crisps with chocolate for dessert). Having just read a dietblog DietGirl by an Australian women who has spent the last five years shedding half her body weight, I have realised just how lazy I've become. I read all her blog in one sitting but I don't recommend you do that (it took me about five hours) but if you're wondering a) if it's possible and b) how to do it, I suggest you dip your toe in. She's reminded me that there are no magic solutions, just persistence and bloody hard work. This ties into the money thing - if I plan my meals, not only will I buy only what I need but I'll also avoid last minute dashes to the supermarket (where I will buy something processed, quick and easy to prepare ie pizza or sandwiches)

So:

Resolution Number 4
Plan my meals and shop accordingly

Resolution Number 5
Prepare my food the night before

Exercise 1: Before I came out here I was a bit of a gym bunny (difficult to believe I know, but true). I'd found some classes that I really enjoyed doing and which I felt were benefiting me. However, since I've been here, NOTHING. At first the excuse was 'I can't join a gym because I don't know what my timetable will be and I don't want to pay for expensive membership and then not be able to use it', then the enormity of work overtook me and the excuse became 'I'm too tired to go to the gym'. Now my body has started hurting in all sorts of subtle ways, my knees and hips are showing signs of wear (too much weight), my shoulders are tight (too many hours in front of the computer) and my back is painful (bad bed). I was taking tango lessons for a while but gave that up for a whole host of reasons (more on that later). The latest excuse for not joining the gym is the cost - it does seem to be very expensive here. But you know what? enough with the excuses, the truth is I miss it. When I was going to the gym I had a lot more energy, I was happier, my body was better able to cope with all the crap life throws up and I slept better. So:

Resolution Number 6
Join a gym

Exercise 2: I blogged a few weeks ago that I was going to start using the stairs instead of the lift. Well I restarted that after the holiday and I intend to keep going with it. Wherever possible I will use stairs rather than a lift. Additionally I'm going to stop using the escalators when I travel on the underground, from now on it's stairs all the way! Interestingly DietGirl has the same problem as me about going down (stairs that is) which she attributes to not being able to see her feet - I've always been more worried about falling but maybe it's the same thing under a different guise.

Resolution Number 7
Use the stairs

Exercise 3: You may remember that I started taking tango classes soon after I arrived here but that I stopped going. This was mainly because there were no men to dance with. However L and I wanted to continue so I put the internet to work and drew up a list of classes at times we could do and L phoned around and found one. We went on Friday evening. It was packed and there was a whole different attitude to dancing. There wasn't any formal instruction as such (and if we hadn't had those lessons before the holiday we'd have been totally lost) but the atmosphere was great and I really liked the music (although L didn't). So we're going back next week. The interesting thing was I danced in my trainers, rather than heels and that was so much better. I will be getting some tango shoes but only once I've mastered the basics. In the meantime, I might try to get some soft soled lace ups to dance in. No resolution here, just an update.

Sleeping: Most of the time I sleep well but I have the occasional bout of insomnia (luckily they've been at weekends so far). Part of this is due to lack of exercise but it's also due to my emotional state and the lousy mattress I have. I've decided to buy a new mattress. God knows how much it will cost but I'm worth it! This isn't so much a resolution as a reminder to myself.

My emotional state: Most of the time I bumble along fairly happy, no great ups and downs, and I can live with that. But sometimes, I get miserable. I miss my family, my friends and my lovers. (I started writing about this but I've deleted it, maybe I'll expand it in another post). I do get lonely here. I haven't met anyone who's on the same mental wavelength as me and it's tough. Exercise will help with this as it does help keep me on an even keel. Again, no resolution but for your information only. BTW comments are open but I won't be having a discussion with you about how I'm feeling - that generally leads to me spending time and energy reassuring you that I'm not suicidal (I never have been) and I don't want to spend that time or energy - accept this and move on.

My Social life: this leads on from the previous section. I don't have much of a social life. I don't speak Spanish and most Argentines are very family/friends oriented, prefering to spend their time in their flats. Most of my students being young enough to be my children doesn't help. However, I've been offered the chance of an 'intercambio'. This is a language exchange, we spend one hour talking in English and one hour talking in Spanish. I've been in two minds because I don't think I can spend one minute speaking in Spanish but I've decided to give it a go. I've also decided to take learning Spanish seriously which means actually doing my homework and trying to use the language (eekk). So:

Resolution Number 8
Take learning Spanish seriously and do the homework

OK that's enough I think. I't taken me the best part of four hours to put this together, thanks for sticking with it through to the end.